I'm not doing this because of your gentle reminders of how worthwhile life is and dangerous driving can be. Or because of the guttural screams the G-forces squeeze out of you when I hug the curves on 495. Or because all the post-rush hour drivers on my commute fear and hate the Flying Malibu with the taped up taillight.
No, I'm doing this because I worked from home today and I realized that embracing the hateful, aggressive driver within me every morning was leading me down the path of the Dark Side. Sure, I might end up Sith Lord of The GW Parkway--but then I'd have to use a double-sided lightsaber. And everybody knows double-sided lightsabers are flashy and useless.
Today is the day I embrace the Light Side. I'll just..use the force of my horns to push all the idiots out of the left lane. *contemplative facepalm*
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